A guy is driving around the back woods of Tennessee and he sees
a sign
in front of a broken down shanty-style house "Talking Dog for
Sale."
He rings the bell and the owner appears and tells him the dog is
in the
backyard. The guy goes into the back yard and sees a nice
looking
Labrador retriever sitting there. "You talk?" he asks. "Yep,"
the lab
replies.
After the guy recovers from the shock of hearing a dog talk, he
says
"So, what's your story?" The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I
discovered
that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the
government, so I told the CIA and they had me sworn into the
toughest
branch of the armed services...the United States Marines. You
know one
of their nicknames is "The Devil Dogs."
In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country,
sitting
in rooms with spies and world leaders; because no one figured a
dog
would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies
for eight
years running, but the jetting around really tired me out, and I
knew I
wasn't getting any younger.
So, I decided to settle down. I retired from the Corps (8 dog
years is
56 Corps years) and signed up for a job at the airport to do
some
undercover security, wandering near suspicious characters and
listening
in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch
of
medals. I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just
retired."
The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he
wants for
the dog.
"Ten dollars," the guy says.
"Ten dollars? This dog is amazing! Why on earth are you selling
him so
cheap?"
"Because he's such a bull****ter .. He never did any of that
****. He
was in the Navy!"
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