Something funny for you all

usahellas · Jan 20th, 2005, 11:14 PM

Now without any entention to offend anyone here I would like to post something my brother sent me. I personlly LMAO on this on.

So anyway Explicit language but if you are ex-military you might not even notice.

> Subject: R. Lee Ermey selected as White House Press Spokesman
>
> R. Lee Ermey, for the few of you that missed it, was the host of The
> History Channel's Mail Call and played the D.I. in the movie Full
> Metal Jacket. Ermey is a retired Marine Gunnery Sergeant and a very
> plain speaker as you will soon read. So, for your entertainment, here
> is Retired Marine Gunnery Sergeant R. Lee Ermey at his first press
> conference as White House spokesman.
>
> The main topic of discussion is the Marine in Iraq who shot the Iraq
> insurgent to death. We pick up as the reporter asks about how this
> potential war crime will affect our image in the
> world:
>
> Ermey: "What kind of a pansy-assed question is that?"
>
> Reporter: "Well I think...."
>
> Ermey: "THINK, nancy boy? Get this through that septic tank on top of
> your shoulders moron, I DON'T GIVE A F*CK WHAT YOU THINK, DO YOU
> UNDERSTAND ME??? THAT MARINE SHOT AN ENEMY COMBATANT SH*THEAD, SO GET
> YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR ASS AND DEAL WITH IT BEFORE I MAKE YOU MY OWN
> PERSONAL PIN CUSHION!"
>
> "Next question. You in the blue suit."
>
> Reporter 2: "Don't you think that the world's opinion of our
> operations is important?"
>
> Ermey: "Oh sure! You don't know the times I have cried myself to sleep
> worrying about what some g*d****ed French pansy thinks! Oh the days I
> have had to weep because some sh*t eating terrorist f*cker might be
> mad at us because we went into whatever god-forsaken hole in the sh*t
> that he lives in and killed him. WHAT THE HELL KIND OF DUMBASS
> QUESTION IS THAT YOU PETER PUFFING JACKASS?? WE ARE THE MOTHER F*CKING
> USA, AND WHEN YOU ATTACK US WE ARE GOING TO COME TO YOUR HOUSE AND
> BLOW YOUR STINKING CAMEL-LICKING CARCASS INTO PIECES SO SMALL WE WILL
> BE ABLE TO BURY YOUR SORRY ASS IN A THIMBLE!"
>
> "I know what you are thinking. You are probably afraid, thinking that
> I have such an 'extreme' attitude and that I need to be more
> 'sensitive'
> to other people's feelings. WELL LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING YOU POLE
> SMOKING PANSY! I DON'T GIVE 2 SH*TS WHAT YOU OR ANYBODY ELSE THINKS!
> THIS IS A ****ED WAR, AND IF YOU CAN'T HANDLE THAT YOU SHOULD GO HOME
> AND SUCK ON MAMMA'S TIT!! DO YOU HEAR ME YOU RUNT??
> NOW GET THE F*CK
> OUT OF MY PRESS ROOM BEFORE GO CRAZY AND BEAT THE LIVING SH*T OUT OF
> YOU!"
>
> "Next question, you with the ugly assed tie. Look at that thing. It is
> hideous."
>
> Reporter 3: "Aren't you going against the freedom of the press by..."
>
> Ermey: "FREEDOM?? WHAT IN BLUE HELL DO YOU KNOW ABOUT FREEDOM? I HAVE
> SWEATED MY ASS OFF IN JUNGLES BEING SHOT AT FOR THIS NATION!!
> WHAT IN THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE YOU LITTLE SH*T SUCKING WEASEL? WHEN
> WAS THE LAST TIME YOU PUT YOUR ASS ON THE LINE FOR ANYTHING? AND YET
> YOU HAVE THE UNMITIGATED TEMERITY TO SHOW UP HERE AND MONDAY MORNING
> QUARTERBACK THE ACTIONS OF A MARINE WHO WAS DEFENDING HIMSELF AND HIS
> UNIT FROM ATTACK BY SOM! E MURDEROUS AL-QUEDA SYMPATHIZER!!! YOU WANNA
> KNOW WHAT I AM CONCERNED ABOUT NUMBNUTS? I AM CONCERNED ABOUT A BUNCH
> OF GRABASSTIC, DISORGANIZED MORONS WITH CAMERAS AND MICROPHONES DOING
> THEIR BEST TO PORTRAY OUR BRAVE MEN AND WOMEN AS WAR CRIMINALS! I AM
> CONCERNEDABOUT CHICKEN SH*T PANSIES THAT WANT US TO NEGOTIATE WITH
> TERRORISTS AND THEN WHINE ABOUT THEIR PISS ANT "FREEDOMS!"
>
> Reporter 3: "I..."
>
> Ermey: "Did you have a big bowl of stupid for breakfast this morning
> numbnuts? I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ANOTHER WORD OUT OF THAT COMMIE CRYHOLE
> IN THAT SH*TPILE YOU CALL A HEAD! AND THAT GOES TRIPLE FOR THE REST OF
> YOU PANSY-ASSED MORONS! NOW GET THE F*CK OUT OF MY PRESS ROOM BEFORE I
> SHOVE MY BOOT SO FAR UP YOUR ASS THAT YOU CHOKE TO DEATH ON MY
> SHOELACES!"
>
> Semper Fi
>
>
>