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Jokes

Discussion in 'Pull up a chair and sit for a spell' started by chucktx, Aug 7, 2007.

Page 32 of 61
  1. FLHTbiker

    FLHTbiker Moderator Staff Member

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    I put it on facebooks and know it will piss of my daughter who is totally obamofied by her husband, makes me sick as she doesn't have a mind of her own anymore.
    FLHTbiker, Oct 28, 2009
    #621
  3. mwelych

    mwelych Active Member

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    My sister is the same way... He has much of the population brainwashed!!!:gah:
    mwelych, Nov 1, 2009
    #622
  4. amf4399

    amf4399 Active Member

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    good muslim joke

    2 muslim fathers sitting on their front porches, comparing photos of their sons, first one says this in my oldest, malik, he would be 17 today, but he martyred 2 years ago. The second one says, well this is my oldest, he would be 21 in 3 weeks, but he was martyred about 3 months ago, he died in jihad against the cursed free Americans! First one kind of has a sentimental look on his face, as he says, "Ah, they blow up so fast!"
    amf4399, Nov 1, 2009
    #623
  5. hotroadking

    hotroadking Super Moderator Staff Member

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    The teacher asked the class to use the word 'fasinate' in a sentence.
    Molly put her hand up and said, 'My family went to my granddad's farm, and we all sawhis pet sheep. It was facinating
    The teacher said, Thats was good, but I wanted to use the word 'fascinate', not fascinating.
    Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by little Johnny before.
    She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word facinate, so she called on him.
    Johnny said, My aunt Gina has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight !
    The teacher sat down and cried.
    hotroadking, Nov 24, 2009
    #624
  6. cowboy

    cowboy Moderator Staff Member

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    :roflmao::roflmao:
    cowboy, Nov 24, 2009
    #625
  7. BluePearl

    BluePearl New Member

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    Traffic Camera

    A man was driving when he saw the flash of a traffic camera. He figured that his picture had been taken for exceeding the limit, even though he knew that he was not speeding... Just to be sure, he went around the block and passed the same spot, driving even more slowly, but again the camera flashed. Now he began to think that this was quite funny, so he drove even slower as he passed the area again, but the traffic camera again flashed. He tried a fourth time with the same result. He did this a fifth time and was now laughing when the camera flashed as he rolled past,

    This time at a snail's pace.....Two weeks later, he got five tickets in the mail for driving without a seat belt..

    You can't fix stupid.


    :banghead::banghead:
    BluePearl, Nov 27, 2009
    #626
  8. chucktx

    chucktx Moderator Staff Member

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    :roflmao::roflmao::witsend:
    chucktx, Nov 27, 2009
    #627
  9. TM103

    TM103 Active Member

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    :roflmao::roflmao: sounds like AZ foto cams.
    TM103, Nov 28, 2009
    #628
  10. quietone

    quietone Active Member

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    Know how to circumsize a whale? You use 4skindivers
    quietone, Nov 29, 2009
    #629
  11. chucktx

    chucktx Moderator Staff Member

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    :gah::D
    chucktx, Nov 29, 2009
    #630
  12. FLHTbiker

    FLHTbiker Moderator Staff Member

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    :rolleyes: :rolleyes::D
    FLHTbiker, Nov 29, 2009
    #631
  13. Wideglide85

    Wideglide85 Active Member

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    3 blonde chicks walk into a bar. The bartender looks up & says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"
    Wideglide85, Nov 30, 2009
    #632
  14. chucktx

    chucktx Moderator Staff Member

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    :banghead::gah::)
    chucktx, Nov 30, 2009
    #633
  15. BluePearl

    BluePearl New Member

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    :roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:
    BluePearl, Dec 1, 2009
    #634
  16. hotroadking

    hotroadking Super Moderator Staff Member

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    A military father who was back home after a long deployment was sitting at the breakfast table with his wife and three sons. He asked the oldest boy, "What do you want for breakfast son?" The boy said, "Why don't you pass me some of that God Damned oatmeal?" The dad reached across the table and smacked the boy and sent him off to his room with no breakfast. He then asked the middle boy what he wanted for breakfast and that boy replied, "Well I'd really like some of that God Damned oatmeal." The father repeated the same treatment given to the oldest boy. He then wearlily asked the youngest son, "What would you like for breakfast?" The boy looked around nervously and said, "Well, I'm not really sure, but you can bet your sweet ass I don't want any of that God Damned oatmeal!"
    hotroadking, Dec 3, 2009
    #635
  17. chucktx

    chucktx Moderator Staff Member

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    :fight::):eek:
    chucktx, Dec 3, 2009
    #636
  18. FLHTbiker

    FLHTbiker Moderator Staff Member

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    Good one :roflmao::roflmao:
    FLHTbiker, Dec 3, 2009
    #637
  19. cowboy

    cowboy Moderator Staff Member

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    :eek::roflmao:
    cowboy, Dec 3, 2009
    #638
  20. quietone

    quietone Active Member

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    Little Timmy comes in from playing with his friends in the back yard an asks grandma "whats it called when two people sleep in the same bedroom and one person is on top of the other?" Gramma is a little taken back and not wanting to lie to her grandson says "that would be called sexual intercourse" to which Timmy said oh and went back outdoors. About ten minutes later Timmy yells in the backdoor and says "GRANDMA- ITS CALLED BUNK BEDS AND JACKS MOM WANTS TO TALK TO YOU RIGHT NOW!!!
    quietone, Dec 3, 2009
    #639
  21. chucktx

    chucktx Moderator Staff Member

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    lol......
    chucktx, Dec 4, 2009
    #640
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